E38 7er

"SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman" (dasborgen)
07/07/2014 at 20:22 • Filed to: None

This is why I'm an elitist douche-prick E38 owner (twice over

BOW DOWN TO ME PEASANTS!

DISCUSSION (35)

Manuél Ferrari > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:24

I love this

Nibby > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:24

NEEEEEEEEEEEEED

KylesPerGallon > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:24

Glorious Bavarian Master Race

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:25

Have you considered that you might be that way even without the car?

#itwasthereItookit

AM3R > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:26

I need an '01 SWB sport 740i. Can't. Find. Any.

Clown Shoe Pilot > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:27

the best part is that when it breaks and the peasant can't afford the parts to fix it, you can pick it up for EVEN CHEAPER. For some reason, parts for old 7 series cost like they're for some kinda 90K car.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Clown Shoe Pilot
07/07/2014 at 20:31

I've had to replace 2 alternators.... one had a voltage reg fail, the 2nd one had the bearing completely seize up and threw a belt.... So I have 2 spare alternators I can rebuild into a single good one

And it's fucking WATER COOLED

Clown Shoe Pilot > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:32

of COURSE it's water cooled, because it's electrical and WHY WOULDN'T IT BE?

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > AM3R
07/07/2014 at 20:34

Mine's that...but it's a 99

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast.
07/07/2014 at 20:34

Did you know you have a penis?

bhardoin > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:47

My friend has a 3 series of that vintage that recently, without provocation, managed to turn on its parking lights in the middle of the day - but only on the left side of the car. After fiddling with the headlight/running light switch for a while, we turned the car on and off. Somehow, that fixed the problem. I have no idea what else to say about the electrics in these cars.

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 20:52

You know me, there's no fruit too low for me to pick. All joking aside, my neighbor had one of those and I am not joking when I tell you that there was not a day that went by that he wasn't having to fix something on it. To give you an idea of the amout of problems he had with his 7 series, he sold it and bought a Range Rover...BECAUSE IT WAS MORE RELIABLE! let that one sink in for a minute.

phenotyp > Clown Shoe Pilot
07/07/2014 at 20:53

WHY IS EVERYBODY SHOUTING?

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > bhardoin
07/07/2014 at 20:54

1) what year was it?

2) what country is he in?

If it's a E46 (99-2006 gen) in everywhere but the USA (but USA dealers can program it into the Light Control Module) , then it's working as intended. He activated the "parking light" feature

bhardoin > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:00

1- not sure

2- US

huh, didn't know they had that. But probably not working as intended, as the lights went on while the car was parked, locked, and off. But at least I now know that its some sketchy wiring in the column rather than some unreasonable computer bullshit.

NotUnlessRoundIsFunny > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:04

Those are still the best-looking 7 Series to me. Just sort of...classy. A friend had one that was a joy to drive.

That said, the dealer never could figure out why the alarm would go off at random times, which was a real drag.

desertdog5051 > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:09

That was good.

Distraxi's idea of perfection is a Jagroen > Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast.
07/07/2014 at 21:10

Its threads like this that make me glad I drive a nice, reliable, Jag.

StoneCold > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:11

This ad is why I bought my '95.

It was superior to anything in the price range, worked on it myself (thankfully nothing too expensive broke on it in my year and a half of ownership), and helped me accept finer German cars (I still have a bit of a grudge against cheap German cars [LOOKING AT YOU, JETTA]).

I miss it all the time, and it lives 3 doors down from me now :'(

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > NotUnlessRoundIsFunny
07/07/2014 at 21:15

It was probably the hood alarm sensor.... Mine failed like that... I simply unplugged it, fooling the Alarm ECU into thinking my hood is always close.

It's a very common sensor to have fail

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > bhardoin
07/07/2014 at 21:16

On the E46 The Light Control Module is in a location where water can get to it, due to the location in the trunk and the tail light seals leaking. LCM failure is quite common on the E46.

That's my insight from first hand knowledge. Hopefully I helped :)

bhardoin > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:20

I'm way less confused as to his phantom light problem, but still baffled by some of the electronics design. Thanks though!

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:22

If it comes down to a new Corolla or a used BMW...

I'd pick something else.

NotUnlessRoundIsFunny > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 21:39

Dammit! Now I find that out! :-)

Our dealer sucked though. Still does from my experience.

AM3R > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 22:13

Still a great ride. Any pictures?

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > AM3R
07/07/2014 at 22:26

His name is Brutus the Ballerina

Brutus because 4.4L V8 and TORQUES!!!!!

Ballerina because Sport Package makes him agile

Kinja'd!!!

AM3R > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 22:48

the E38 is the only car that can be given a guys name.... And STILL be wanted.

Trevor Mohr > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/07/2014 at 23:03

I wanted an E65-E68 7-Series (Yes, please don't kill me for saying I love these), and I could of had one for the price of my '14 Mk6 GTI... Parents thought otherwise haha. I could of even pulled off a bit more worn F01 7-Series.. I love them!

unclevanos (Ovaltine Jenkins) > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/08/2014 at 00:42

Looks just like my 740il with the exception of cracked bumpers, peeling clear coat, and a saggy headliner.

Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast. > Distraxi's idea of perfection is a Jagroen
07/08/2014 at 11:51

I both love and fear Jags...I want one sooooobad, but I know how they can be a harsh mistress when it comes to reliability.......What kind do you have?

kalabaddon > phenotyp
07/08/2014 at 12:39

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT! LOUD NOISES!

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/08/2014 at 13:41

Kinja'd!!!

"Sheep" is the better word here. Or lemming.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com
07/08/2014 at 16:01

No... it's peasant and that's the final word

PEASANT!

Distraxi's idea of perfection is a Jagroen > Mr. Ontop, No Strokes, No Smokes...Goes Fast.
07/08/2014 at 17:40

2001 XJR.

They're a different maintenance experience from the Germans - there's always something wearing out or going wrong, but, provided you've done the well-known preventive upgrades, it's usually not serious or expensive. If you're doing your own work, that is. If you don't mind spending a fair bit of time fiddling at the weekend, they can be a comparatively cheap car to run (my experience based on 2 Jags). Unlike the equivalent Merc or Audi, which will be perfect right up until an essential, unobtainium, component fails and costs you more than the car.

Also, because of the horrendous depreciation and reputation, you can get a better one for the $ than the German equivalents, which evens out the maintenance gamble even further. There's absolutely no way I'd have taken on an M5 which cost the same as my XJR, for example, it'd have been a thrashed out dog.

Having said which, old luxury car = gamble, whatever flavour it is. But that's the price you have to pay if you're going to be a Bloated Oppressor Of The Masses on a wage slave's budget.

surgesilk > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman
07/09/2014 at 01:31

I read it quickly and thought it said 'pheasant'....not sure which word I prefer honestly.